Showing posts with label black women. Show all posts
Showing posts with label black women. Show all posts

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

This was my MBA experience!





Except for me it wasn't law school, it was business school. And we only had four black people in my class of 200 students.

"I feel like an outsider constantly. And I don't feel like at my own school, I can solely focus on being a student."

"Being in class as the only black woman was really hard."

"It feels isolating. It feels horrible... It feels like I don't belong."

"It's lonely, upsetting."

"There was a lot of underlying assumptions about other people because of what they looked like."

"It's so far from being a safe space that it almost feels like staying at home would be better for my mental health, for myself, than being in class."

"I'm in a room of 80 people, just sitting by myself, and everywhere I look, no one can help me, no one can jump in, no one can at least acknowledge what I'm saying has any truth."


If only this video had come out when I was business school, then maybe I wouldn't have felt so alone.


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Friday, December 13, 2013

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Prominent black lady news.




Booo.

I don't struggle with puzzles, except for why there aren't more colorful people on my television.


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Wednesday, September 11, 2013

I'd watch this as a web series.




via Interview: Writer/Producer Lena Waithe Talks New Series 'Twenties' + Watch Pilot Presentation, by Masha Dowell, Shadow and Act.


Shadow and Act: What is a pilot presentation? Why did you opt for this route? 

LW: A lot of networks read the script and loved it, but they either thought there wasn’t an audience for it or that it already existed. Of course I became extremely frustrated because I knew neither of those things were true. So I realized I had to show these network executives that TWENTIES was one of a kind and that there was nothing on TV like it. And I figured the best way to do that was to shoot a pilot presentation, which meant we would shoot a few pivotal scenes from the script, edit them together, and give people a sense of how the show would look and feel. Lucky for me, Justin Simien (writer/director DEAR WHITE PEOPLE) offered to direct it and Flavor Unit was willing to pay for it. Now I had the opportunity to show people what I was going for instead of trying to explain it to them. My plan wasn’t just to show it to executives, but to show it to the world so that the people could have a voice in this as well. And just so we’re clear: this is not a web series! I repeat this is not a web series. Not that there’s anything wrong with doing a web series. I’ve done one. My goal is to partner with a network that understands what I’m going for.

[...]


Shadow and Act: What do you want us to do after we’ve watched it?
 
LW: The good news is I don’t want your money. There’s no Kickstarter or IndieGoGo attached to this project. All we want you to do is commit to sharing TWENTIES with twenty of your friends. The more you spread the word the better chance we have of getting it on TV. We’ll keep pitching. You keep sharing. Let’s do this!



I don't know if there is a network that is going to understand and agree with what Lena is going for. There's a reason there aren't many scripted shows from the US with a lead character that is


  1. an L, G, B, or T person
  2. a black woman
  3. a lesbian woman
  4. a person talking to multiple black people
  5. a black lesbian woman talking to a bunch of other black people

As Lena pointed out, the networks "thought there wasn’t an audience for it or that it already existed", even though "neither of those things were true." If I had a project as amazing as TWENTIES, and networks passed on it, I wouldn't try to prove anything to them. It's 2013. I would produce, distribute, and promote TWENTIES myself, online, as a web series. I would have more control over the show, avoiding interference from well-meaning, but misguided network notes. Also, people would actually be able to see it. The series wouldn't be stuck in development for years, with the risk of never making it to air.

For me, it would be a waste of time trying to sell a product to someone who has no interest in buying it. There just aren't enough network executives who both see the value in and are willing to take a chance on airing a show about the honest story of a black woman, much less one who is articulate and queer. Instead of emphasizing the fact that "This is NOT a web series", why not embrace the new medium and create a successful web series (while we're waiting on Dear White People)? This would allow a fan base to grow around TWENTIES, and make the sale of the project even more profitable (and likely).

I have opinions!



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Monday, May 27, 2013

Musings from a Black Woman: So now I want to buy an Audi.




It's that simple.

Your move, other overpriced sports car companies.


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Sunday, May 12, 2013

Musings from a Black Woman: "It's time to rock."




Hooray for colorful mature ladies doing their thing!


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Tuesday, January 24, 2012

"People just come up and touch your hair?"




"I also think in this day and age, it's the easiest thing to just label somebody as a racist, and kind of, it's often an unfair thing, 'cause it's a very difficult thing, to, to defend yourself, unless there is actual proof."

"Did you worry about hurting her feelings when you made this video?"

"I guess the flip side is you don't want people watching everything they say, and feeling like everything is a minefield. Which, around this subject, I think a lot of people do."


Okay, seriously, Mr. Cooper? You have completely missed the point. This is a prime example of why certain people should not be allowed to go on national TV and talk about topics which they have no knowledge of and clearly cannot relate to.

The video was not about calling people racist. (Although, I definitely would say, and have said, that all of those comments are racist.) The video was not about Franchesca making fun of her white friend. The video was not about censoring white people, even those who regularly say ignorant things to black people. The video (and the second video, hooray!) was about black women and the offensive statements that they have to deal with on a daily basis. This was not a time to deal with some audience member's "privilege tears" (at 4:45), Anderson Cooper. This was definitely time for an Oprah moment.

I was irritated when I watched that Anderson Cooper video on the YouTubes yesterday morning. I felt better after I watched the following video last night:




This guy gets it. And he is articulate as well. ;) He made me miss Mr. Smooth.Link


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Sunday, May 29, 2011

This topic makes me sad,




but having the discussion makes me glad. It's important to talk about difficult subjects, even if they make some people uncomfortable. In the words of Leslie Bennetts, author of The Feminine Mistake, "The facts don't change just because you refuse to look at them."

via Jezebel, "The Heartbreaking Reality Of Being A Dark-Skinned Black Woman"


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Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Musings from a Black Woman: On Hip Hop and Cultural Ramifications




From My Mic Sounds Nice: A Truth About Women and Hip-Hop, a documentary airing on BET:

"There are a whole lot of reasons why female rappers aren't as prominent in the hip hop game as they should be. But to me, honestly, I believe the bottom line is, it's a boys' game. It's a man's world. Straight up."

- Nikki D


"Male rappers have such an amazing amount of power and influence. And if they're spending a majority of the time dissing African-American women, then what is expected of the people that they're performing for, or the people that are buying their records. It's not much to be said for them wanting to spend money to hear an African-American woman speak her mind."

- MC Lyte


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Thursday, July 15, 2010

A guy named Chad


Some of you readers may have heard about the controversy surrounding Chad "Ochocinco" Johnson's new dating series on VH1. Some of you may be wondering, "What's an Ochocinco?", while others may be asking, "What's VH1?".

The show is called Ochocinco: The Ultimate Catch, and the issue in the blogosphere is that only four of the 17 women he selected out of 85 candidates to be his "ultimate catch" are black. More discussion on the topic can be found in the articles below:

Chad Ochocinco Criticized For Not Choosing Black Women On VH1 Dating Show, by Jessica Wakeman, The Frisky.

Ochocinco Talks Dating and Addresses Black Women, by Yolanda Sangweni, Essence.

Here is my take on the situation:

1. Who names themselves after two numbers in a language he (allegedly) doesn't even speak?

2. How did Ochocinco get a show on VH1? Well, I guess if someone like Frank The Entertainer--whose claim to fame is being a contestant on a spinoff of a spinoff of a spinoff of a spinoff--then giving a show to an infamous football player makes more sense.

3. I have never heard of a corresponding situation on a dating show like The Bachelor or Rock of Love. Yes, on those shows there are occasionally one or two black women (who usually pass the brown paper bag test) to throw some token diversity in the mix. But I have never heard of an instance in which any of the all white Bachelors or Mr. Michaels only had four white women to choose from on their shows. I don't recall Chris Harrison announcing, "This season on The Bachelor, guess who's coming to dinner? Keisha and Rosario, come on down!"

4. Considering the rainbow salad that is the United States of America, I would like to see a dating competition show that featured a bachelor or bachelorette who was neither white nor black. How about Mei Ling of Love, or For the Love of Raj, or Carlos: A Basement Affair?

5. I have never met a black person name Chad. However, the only person I've met named Tyrone is white. Think about that.


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Saturday, February 20, 2010

"Needs more Jaleesa."


Sinbad Politely Requests That You Do Not Refer to It As a Comeback, Vulture via Jezebel.

My favorite part of the interview:


When you were doing Jingle All the Way with Arnold Schwarzenegger, did you foresee a political career for him?

He was always going to run for some kind of office. I wish he had not! I liked Arnold as an entertainer. He did a lot of things as an activist. He had a fitness program for kids I was involved with because of him. I just think right now as governor, man, he screwed up the education system out here. He cut the summer program. With summer school now, it takes you seven years to finish college.


I can!

1. Regina King on Southland

2. Wanda Sykes on The New Adventures of Old Christine

3. Niecy Nash on Clean House

4. S. Epatha Merkerson on Law & Order

5. Keke Palmer on True Jackson, VP

That was not easy. What is Dawnn Lewis doing these days?

And yes, readers, at the top of this post, that is Ray J in the poster for The Sinbad Show. The same Ray J who gave us a second season of this:




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Friday, February 19, 2010

The back pocket girl



"Are their standards too high? Or are the pickings too slim?" via ELEV8.

First of all, watch the video. Meanwhile, I will look for a transcript, or summarize the important parts.

Second, Mr. Steve Harvey: how many black women--or people in general--are corporate executives making $150,000, and then demanding that their partner make more than that? I would love to make $150,000. That is the end of that sentence. I must have missed out on the growing problem of black women running corporations and making six-figure salaries. I need to become a part of that problem. I might be alone, but I'd have some money.

~


"[Steve Harvey's] advice [for these women]? Go for the older man."

No. Not everyone wants to date a 53-year-old Steve Harvey. I don't think that is a compromise that group of women in their late 20s and early 30s want to, or should have to, make.

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Monday, February 15, 2010

If only I were less bossy.


My Race-Based Valentine., by Jenée Desmond-Harris, Time via Yahoo! News. Emphases mine.


This Valentine's Day, more of us than ever will be looking for love online. And if recent studies are any guide, relatively few women on mainstream dating sites will bother to respond to overtures from men of Asian descent. Likewise, black women will be disproportionately snubbed by men of all races. Yes, even though America has been flirting intensely with a postracial label for some time, color blindness is not upheld as an ideal in the realm of online romance. On some sites, it's not even an option. (See the 25 most important films on race.)


Chemistry.com requires users to identify their ethnicity; like eHarmony, it considers members' racial preferences when suggesting matches. Match.com lets users filter their searches by race. The site's profiles include space to indicate interest (or lack thereof) in various racial and ethnic groups. But after Jennifer House, a black woman in Los Angeles, perused one too many profiles only to find the guys had checked off every box except African American, she changed her strategy. "Now I look at that section first so as not to get my hopes up," she says.


[ . . . ]


. . . a study published last year in Social Science Research examined 1,558 profiles that white daters living in or near big U.S. cities placed on Yahoo! Personals, which, much like Match, lists 10 racial and ethnic groups users can select as preferred dates. Among the women, 73% stated a preference. Of these, 64% selected whites only, while fewer than 10% included East Indians, Middle Easterners, Asians or blacks. (See a nerdy Valentine's Day guide on Techland.com.)


The story is a little different for the men, 59% of whom stated a racial preference. Of these, nearly half selected Asians, but fewer than 7% did for black women. Why? One theory offered by the study's lead author, Cynthia Feliciano, a sociologist at the University of California at Irvine, is that men's choices are influenced by the media's portrayal of Asian women as being hypersexual and black women as being bossy.




I keep explaining this phenomenon to my friends. I express to them that it affects me personally and how unhappy it makes me feel. Yet half of my friends still deny that the above situation is an actual problem. So I doubt that they will ever be convinced, even with an 87-year-old American institution acknowledging that racism continues to be a problem in 2010.

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Friday, February 12, 2010

"I think the world would be better off if I stopped doing interviews."



WARNING: Graphic words ahead. May not be suitable for children or for sensitive readers (like me).

There are times when I think to myself, "Am I being the best Bianca I can be? If I just work a little harder, maybe people would see how great I am, and things will turn out okay."

Then comes the John Mayer interview, and I no longer feel there would be a payoff from my working any harder at all.

When I first read about John's apology, which was featured on Yahoo's front page, I was confused. I don't keep up with the regular day-to-day nonsense of John Mayer, from his mockings of paparazzi to his incessant tweets. I'm not even sure when his last album came out, or if anyone would care about him if he hadn't done two famous blond ladies. So I had no idea what John was apologizing for, or why it was headline news.

Tonight while I was watching The Soup, I read John Mayer's entire March 2010 Playboy article. None of it is flattering to John, but here is the excerpt that made my skin crawl:


MAYER: I grew up in my own head. As soon as I lose that control, once I have to deal with someone else’s desires, I cut and run. I’m pretty culpable about being hard to live with. I have had a good run of imagining things into reality. I’ve got a huge streak of successes based on my own inventions. If you tell me I’m wrong or that I’m overthinking something, well, overthinking has given me everything in my career. I have a hard time not looking at anxiety disorder as being like an ATM. I can invent things really well. I mean, I have unbelievable orgasms alone. They’re always the best. They always end the way I want them to end. And I have such an ability to make believe, I can almost project something onto my wall, watch it and get off to it: sexually, musically, it doesn’t matter. When I meet somebody, I’m in a situation in which I can’t run it because another person is involved. That means letting someone else talk, not waiting for them to remind you of something interesting you had in mind.

PLAYBOY: Masturbation for you is as good as sex?

MAYER: Absolutely, because during sex, I’m just going to run a filmstrip. I’m still masturbating. That’s what you do when you’re 30, 31, 32. This is my problem now: Rather than meet somebody new, I would rather go home and replay the amazing experiences I’ve already had.

PLAYBOY: You’d rather jerk off to an ex-girlfriend than meet someone new?

MAYER: Yeah. What that explains is that I’m more comfortable in my imagination than I am in actual human discovery. The best days of my life are when I’ve dreamed about a sexual encounter with someone I’ve already been with. When that happens, I cannot lay off myself.



Okay, so that wasn't the statement he apologized for. It was still creepy, though. Dude has is-sues!

Here comes the super skin-crawly part:


PLAYBOY: If you didn’t know you, would you think you’re a douche bag?

MAYER: It depends on what I picked up. My two biggest hits are “Your Body Is a Wonderland” and “Daughters.” If you think those songs are pandering, then you’ll think I’m a douche bag. It’s like I come on very strong. I am a very…I’m just very. V-E-R-Y. And if you can’t handle very, then I’m a douche bag. But I think the world needs a little very. That’s why black people love me.



Oh, really? Am I the only one who missed the throngs of black John Mayer fans? He's not freaking Justin Timberlake. By looking at his fans, sadly John is more akin to Hootie.

The oversharing continues:


PLAYBOY: Because you’re very?

MAYER: Someone asked me the other day, “What does it feel like now to have a hood pass?” And by the way, it’s sort of a contradiction in terms, because if you really had a hood pass, you could call it a nigger pass. Why are you pulling a punch and calling it a hood pass if you really have a hood pass? But I said, “I can’t really have a hood pass. I’ve never walked into a restaurant, asked for a table and been told, ‘We’re full.’"

PLAYBOY: It is true; a lot of rappers love you. You recorded with Common and Kanye West, played live with Jay-Z.

MAYER: What is being black? It’s making the most of your life, not taking a single moment for granted. Taking something that’s seen as a struggle and making it work for you, or you’ll die inside. Not to say that my struggle is like the collective struggle of black America. But maybe my struggle is similar to one black dude’s.



And which black dude's struggle would that be? Malcolm X's? Medgar Evers's? Michael Vick's?

The best is yet to come:


PLAYBOY: Do black women throw themselves at you?

MAYER: I don’t think I open myself to it. My dick is sort of like a white supremacist. I’ve got a Benetton heart and a fuckin’ David Duke cock. I’m going to start dating separately from my dick.

PLAYBOY: Let’s put some names out there. Let’s get specific.

MAYER: I always thought Holly Robinson Peete was gorgeous. Every white dude loved Hilary from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. And Kerry Washington. She’s superhot, and she’s also white-girl crazy. Kerry Washington would break your heart like a white girl. Just all of a sudden she’d be like, “Yeah, I sucked his dick. Whatever.” And you’d be like, “What? We weren’t talking about that.” That’s what “Heartbreak Warfare” is all about, when a girl uses jealousy as a tactic.


Yeesh.

For the record, I have never thrown myself at John Mayer. I have never loved John Mayer. I don't love John Mayer now. And unless he saves some babies from a burning ship, I doubt I will ever love John Mayer in the future.

The twisted, yet honorable, part of the whole debacle is that he was telling the truth. And I know from personal experience that he is not the only guy--regardless of color or fame or nationality--who feels that way. Hence, the skin crawling, the resentment, and the heartache. But mostly, this reinforces the persistent sick feeling in my stomach when I encounter people who deny the privilege that they have, simply by being born into the right demographic.

Finally, a quote from a commenter on the thread following the article, "When Racefail Meets Playboy: The John Mayer Interview," by AJ Plaid, Racialicious:

"The bitch of it is Mayer’s comment is–yet again–another pop-culture 'confirmation' that Black women are undateable, which translates to utterly undesireable and unfuckable."

And the world goes to great pains to make sure black women never ever forget it.



Happy Black History Month!

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Tuesday, February 09, 2010

Musings from a Black Woman: Classy People on VH1


I can't find a video clip of the VH1 commercial in which Fantasia, Pepa, Kittie, and Jacque talk about black women. So I have transcribed what they said below:


Fantasia: How would I personally describe the modern black woman?

Pepa: Strong.

Kittie: Determined? Resourceful?

Pepa: Getting an education. Not taking no for an answer.

Fantasia: Independent. Confident.

Pepa: Women today, like the Oprahs and Michelle Obama, are, you know, living example
of that.

Kittie: I don't need a big S on my chest. But I would like to be acknowledged.

Jacque: Amazingly resilient.

Fantasia: Yeah. That's our black woman of today.


Why the baby picture? Because who doesn't love a happy baby? I hope she grows up to be a happy black woman.

~

Now for some not so classy people on VH1:




Happy Black History Month!

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Thursday, August 20, 2009

Whenever I hear the words "Thomas Jefferson",


this is what comes to my mind, too:

Thomas Jefferson: The Face of a Rapist, by Renee, Feministe. Emphases mine.


Americans look at Thomas Jefferson and see the one of the authors of the Declaration of Independence, a statesman, a former president and one of the founding fathers,’ however; when I look at him, I see the face of a rapist. When Jefferson first met Sally Hemings, his slave through inheritance, she would have been no more than 15 or 16 years old. It is rumoured that when she returned from France with him, that she was already pregnant with his child.

[ . . . ]

No matter how many times Black women have angrily contested the use of the term love affair between Hemings and Jefferson, it continues to be the most common descriptor by those who believe the DNA evidence. This assumes that Hemings actually had the power to deny Jefferson sexual access, or that Jefferson had a right to Sally’s body for the purposes of sexual gratification. Both suppositions are erroneous. Due to the patriarchal nature of gender relations, many men believe that they exist with the right to access women’s bodies and that is specifically grounded in the power imbalance between the genders. If we can acknowledge in a modern context that a power imbalance exists between men and women, how much more likely is it that this same imbalance existed between Jefferson and Hemings?

Some may look back at Jefferson and simply claim that he was a man of his time and that he should not be judged outside of historical context, however; in my mind a rapist is a rapist. What he did at the time may not have been considered a violation due to current race and gender relations, however; today we can correctly name his actions. Sally did not have the power to consent to his advances even if she was so inclined; this simple fact must be affirmed not only to honour the memory of Hemings but to change the social understanding that Black women’s bodies are unrapeable. We are not naturally licentious whores who exist to fulfill the sexual fantasies of depraved racist men. We are women that must be accorded the right to control over our bodies without punishment for any decisions we make in that regard.


And yet, Mr. Jefferson has a memorial in my nation's capital. (So does his fellow slave-owner and noted tax-evader George Washington.) This is despite the fact that Meredith Simons at the controversial site Double XX does not think we in the United States live in a rape culture, mainly because she doesn't seem to know anyone who has been raped.

I have never owned anyone, assaulted anyone, or started a war with Great Britain. Yet where is my national monument?

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Sunday, August 16, 2009

Part of the Problem


This week I was having a conversation with one of my new friends, which went something like this:

New friend: "Let's talk about your dating life."

Me: "Let's not. It's terrible."

New friend: "Really?"

Me: "Really. Guys aren't that into me."

New friend: "That's hard to believe. You're great!"

Me: "Yeah, I know. I am great. But . . ."

And then I never know exactly what to say after that, because the friend that I am talking to is rarely another black woman. So the friend does not fully comprehend the background of racism, sexism, colorism, sizeism, and general discrimination and bigotry that is involved when dating, specifically when dating in the United States. It is difficult to explain that, for many male people my age, the person I am on the outside--and sometimes on the inside--is unacceptable. I am not what they had in mind. I am not what they grew up with. Even if my packaging is what they grew up with, the image of me, to them, remains generally inferior; it is not an image which they aspire to have as a partner.

It is hard for me to encapsulate all that pain in one sentence. It would take weeks for my friend to exit their well-constructed comfort zone and learn about gender studies and the history of institutional racism in the US. Then that friend would also have to recognize and accept that those social phenomena continue to negatively affect people like me, despite the few exceptions to the many rules. Watching Killing Us Softly 3 by Jean Kilbourne would be a start. They could also read the posts below:

Tameka Raymond's HuffPo Op-Ed on Colorism Is A Must Read, by ActsofFaithBlog, Acts of Faith In Love and Life.

"She's Pretty for a Dark-Skinned Girl...", by Tameka J. Raymond, The Huffington Post. Emphases mine.


I am a dark-skinned African American woman with features that reflect my ancestry. Debates regarding Light vs. Dark and other biases have plagued our race for years and continues to impact millions of Black women. The deeply rooted intra-racial contempt that lies beneath this inane "compliment" is the reason I've chosen to spark dialogue surrounding the topic of self-hatred in our culture. It saturates every aspect of our lives, dominating the perspectives of our generation as a whole. We culturally are so influential, at times inadvertently, that we affect all with the words we utter and the images we portray. It lends to the theory of systemic racism. I'm authoring this piece because I'm miffed by this reality and would like to share my views on these subjects.

[ . . . ]

Often dark-skinned women are considered mean, domineering and standoffish and it was these very labels that followed Michelle Obama during the campaign for her husband's presidency and which she has had to work tirelessly to combat. I was appalled when I heard a Black woman refer to Michelle Obama as unattractive. The conversation turned into why President Obama picked her as his mate. No one in the witch-hunt made reference to the possibility that Michelle Obama was smart, funny, caring, a good person, highly accomplished or brilliant. Nor did they mention that she previously was President Obama's supervisor. If she were fair skinned, petite with long straight or wavy hair, would the same opinions be linked to her? I seriously doubt it. It is believed that for the dark skinned, dreams are less obtainable.

In fact, I have read similar comments about myself that I am "dark, aggressive, bossy and bitchy." It has been stated that my husband should have been with a "younger, more beautiful" woman. Astoundingly, the majority of the remarks come from African-American women and are mimicked by others. Sadly enough, I don't know nor have I met 99% of those making these assertions. Funny, how we can judge another without having personally seen, interacted with or experienced a person's character.

[ . . . ]

Reading magazines, social media sites, watching our music videos, and television shows feed our appetites for all things 'beauty". Rarely, however do I see depictions of grace and elegance in the form of dark complexioned women.

[ . . . ]

It is my hope that our First Lady and others who share in this effort will continue to be the beacon to shine a light for those who toil on America's beauty totem pole. Now don't get me wrong or take my words out of context. I truly believe that everyone has a right to delineate what they deem is attractive, but we must not confuse perceived "attractiveness" with authentic "beauty."


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Friday, June 05, 2009

So, it's not just me?




Dating 101: Dealing With the Race Factor
, by Arnold Chao, Yahoo! Personals.

Internet love is not colorblind, UC Irvine study. Emphases mine.


[UC Irvine sociologists] Cynthia Feliciano and Belinda Robnett collected data from Yahoo personals between September 2004 and May 2005, randomly selecting profiles of people ages 18-50 in the Los Angeles, New York, Chicago and Atlanta metropolitan regions. While white men were more open to dating outside their race than white women, both had specific racial preferences. White men preferred Asian and Latino dating partners to African Americans; white women were more likely to exclude Asian men.

According to Feliciano, negative portrayals of African American women and Asian men in popular culture could contribute to these preferences.

"Stereotypical images of masculinity and femininity shape dating choices and continue to be perpetuated in the mass media," says Feliciano, sociology and Chicano/Latino studies assistant professor. "The hyper-feminine image of Asian American women contrasts greatly with that of Asian men, who are often portrayed as asexual."

In comparison, the image of the strong African American woman is at odds with idealized notions of submissive and frail women. This may explain why African American women faced high levels of rejection among men, researchers say.

"Cultural portrayals of African American women in the media continue to stress traits seen as negative, such as bossiness," Feliciano says.

[...]

Researchers' analysis of minorities' racial preferences showed that Asians, African Americans and Latinos are more likely to include whites as possible dates than whites are to include them. This suggests that whites, as the dominant group in the U.S., remain in the privileged position of being able to facilitate or hinder the full incorporation of minorities.


Or maybe I'm a crooked pot without a crooked cover due to my "bossiness." I'm sure that's it.

Also, way to be timely, Yahoo! and UC Irvine. I re-reported this phenomenon two years ago, and Racialicious still reports on interracial relationships regularly. Their Craigslist personals article from two years ago is still my favorite. I also enjoyed the open thread on dating that followed a year and a half later.

Furthermore, the survey should have examined same-sex relationships as well. Way to be heteronormative, sociologists.

Ooh! I liked this post, too, by the Frog Princess. I have been saying the same thing for years, yet it is so hard for my friends to comprehend my outlook and my situation. As the Frog Princess says about the open thread on Racialicious, "The article and the comments really validated what I’d been feeling my whole life but that I’m not allowed to say in public because it makes some people uncomfortable."

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Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Musings from a black woman: I can weigh in on this!


Write What You Know: Limiting or Authentic?, by Neesha Meminger, Racialicious. Emphases mine. It is a long post, but keep reading. You can do it!

The other day, I came across a blog post by Editorial Anonymous, “The CSK is Dead (Long Live the CSK).” The Coretta Scott King Award was established in 1969 and is given to outstanding African-American authors and illustrators of children’s books.

Editorial Anonymous writes,


"If the CSK were in charge, male writers wouldn't be able to comment on what it's like to be a woman. The CSK is saying that you cannot understand what it is to be black in America unless you are black.

"Giving an award for creating art about the experience of race is a wonderful thing. But giving an award for creating art and being a particular race?

"That’s racism in action."


So this set me a-pondering. Is it cool for white people to write from the perspective of people of color? How about, as Editorial Anonymous mentions in the quote above, for men to write from the perspective of women?

[. . .]

[prize-winning white woman author Laurie Halse Anderson] also goes on to write, “Slavery affects all Americans today, regardless of ethnic background, or how long our families have lived here. Slavery is the elephant in our country’s living room. It won’t go away until we acknowledge, understand, and deal with it.”


This is absolutely true. Racism (and slavery) affects every single one of us, no matter what our background. White people should be taking it up as an issue – just as men should be taking up the issue of sexism and misogyny –and talking about it, examining it, exploring, and looking for more equitable and just paradigms. And writing a novel like Chains may be this one white woman’s way of doing that.


So . . . what’s the issue? Is there an issue?


There is the view among some writers that one’s creativity or artistic vision should not be limited or “fenced in,” and restricting writers to write only what they know does exactly that. I can’t count how many times I’ve heard some variation of, “Who wants to read about a liberal white woman from New Jersey/Iowa/Seattle?” [I would!]


However, in an interview on ustrek.org, Sherman Alexie, author of Ten Little Indians and The Absolutely True Diary of a Part Time Indian, as well as the writer/director for Smoke Signals, jokingly suggested a “10-year moratorium for white writers so that Indians can tell their own stories instead of having white people tell them. ‘The fact is, when white authors step away from their typewriters, they’re still white. When I get up from the typewriter, I’m still an Indian.’ He wants those authors to question their privileged positions.”


[. . .]

Next time you go to a bookstore, check the shelves and see how many books there, are in any given genre on any given subject, written by people of color. My guess is that very few genres, if any, will have an accurate representation of global demographics in the titles. And that is because there are so few writers of color getting picked up and supported by publishers in any kind of substantial way (a là Twilight, Harry Potter, The Princess Diaries, etc. And, of course, these examples hold true for film as they were all adaptations of novels).


As a South Asian author writing YA, I know from experience that many editors are hesitant to pick up more than one novel with an Indian-American protagonist written by an Indian-American author – even if the two novels are different genres and about entirely different subjects – because both novels still fall under the Multicultural category. This often creates the “everyone elbowing for the one seat on the bus” phenomenon among the marginalized authors who have to fight for that one lone multicultural spot. But I digress…


Yet, as we all know from visiting our local bookstores, or taking an online stroll through Amazon, there is an abundance of books/films by white writers writing on every subject, in every genre – with more than one writer often covering the same topic for varying perspectives. A publishing house can have several white fantasy authors and historical romance authors, even a few writing about spiritual journeys and all of those books are seen as different books. None of my white author friends have ever had their agents come back to them with, “No, this editor declined because she already has a European title about identity issues.”


I, on the other hand,
have heard that exact same phrase, substituting “European” with “Asian.” . . .


I thought about this recently as I was looking at some of my associates who insist upon socializing with and befriending others based on color and gender. I'm not kidding. It is that bad. When you look at them, you feel embarrassed for them. It is hard to believe that they are 30-year-olds living in California, instead of high school seniors going to a segregated Georgia prom.

As I try to explain to people with whom I have enlightening discussions, there is a difference between white men writing about nonwhite and/or nonmale people, and those people writing about themselves. For instance, I know infinitely more about white men than they could ever know about me or any other black woman. I have personally encountered thousands of white men in my short lifetime. That does not include the countless number of white men I have been forced to read about, listen to or watch as part of my "educational" process. In the United States, white men are in your face all the time. Unless you live on a reservation with no mainstream media access, you cannot escape them. I could tell you gross generalizations of what they like, what they don't like, how they grew up, what they think of themselves, the lies they have been told and which they subsequently believe, and who they dream of becoming and why. I could adopt a pseudonym, write Memoirs of Joe Six-Pack, and it would sell millions. (Don't steal my idea! Or, if you do, please blog about it and let me know.)

However, that does not work in the reverse. Some white men have never met any black women, or any nonwhite people at all. Others can count all the colorful friends they have ever had on one hand. They could also count the important black women they have heard of on two hands. An example:

  1. Rosa Parks
  2. Harriet Tubman
  3. Michelle Obama
  4. Oprah
  5. The overly-mentioned Halle Berry
  6. Weezy Jefferson
  7. Whoopi Goldberg
  8. Tyra Banks
  9. um . . .

There aren't even any black women in either of the Night at the Museum movies, as if black women never existed in history, or at least in museums. There are two women (barely) featured in the second one, including Amy Adams, who primarily function as Ben Stiller's younger, better-looking love interest. Or "Amelia Earhart." Whichever.

Based on my above analysis, writing what you know may be limiting, but it can be more authentic. It is revolting that so many books, TV shows and movies that include (white) female characters are written by (white) men. It comes through in the voices of those characters, like when those middle-aged men were writing about those self-involved twentysomethings. It is dishonest, less than believable and disappointing. If more nonwhite and nonmale people were allowed to actively participate in the infrastructure of corporate media, then sure, write whatever you want. But that is not the case, and I do not appreciate having my alleged story told by white men who all share the same one black friend. That is, if my story gets told at all.

.