Now that I have this newfound attention, I should do something positive with it. Hence, this post. All y'all that may have a problem with me and my debating style, please do not take your anger out on my friend and her book. I have actually read this book, so I am qualified to review it.
“That’s what this project was and is – an attempt to expose that inner monologue. I hope that by my doing so, others like me will find a kind of companionship – in knowing that other people have thought the same things, and in knowing that people continue to struggle, because this is an individual’s struggle. For me, this was the hardest part because I felt like I was alone.”
Figuring It Out tells the true story of a young woman admitting to herself, and eventually to her friends—and her boyfriends—that she is a lesbian. The collection of journal entries spans 1997 to 2006, from N’s high school day to her post-college life. I knew the author before she came out, I still know her now, and I am proud of this, her first foray into the literary world. Figuring It Out is kind of like a full-length version of one of the stories in Am I Blue?, which I also own.
My favorite parts in the book were N’s interactions with her family, including her emotionally abusive father. There’s this one scene where he chastises her for using separate glasses for her orange juice and her water, instead of finishing the cup of orange juice, rinsing it out, and reusing it for her water. Crazy.
I also liked the chapter about her former addiction to Paxil. Although I did feel a bit guilty when she described a bad withdrawal trip she’d had, because it had been made worse by the alcohol in the Caribbean Rum Balls I had given her that Christmas. Oops.
Some of the passages did seem repetitive, probably because she felt the same thoughts at multiple times in her life. Also, I would have liked more of a narrative structure to link the passages, as well as what else was going on in her life at the time. It would have been interesting to see N’s tale of coming out in the context of her college experience and in her various workplaces.
Even though I’ve been straight since I was two—though I didn’t realize this until I was 14, when I found out there were other options—I really related to many aspects of Figuring It Out. I identified with N’s conscious introspection, her frustration with a society that doesn’t necessarily accept or understand who she is, her desire to find friends who get what she is going through, and her dreams of finding someone to love who will love her back.
By the by, I read most of this book during jury duty. It was a lovely way to spend my time as I made my (federally mandated) contribution to the American justice system. There could be a humorously ironic observation to be made about the fact that the American justice system does not give the LGBT community the same rights as us straights, but I’ll let you readers make that joke on your own.
I’m not assuming all of you are straight, either. And if you’re not, that’s yet another reason why you should support this book. But I'm still not watching Soul Plane.
