Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Thanksgiving Brilliance, only a few days late.

I'd love to share this poignance with the idiots complaining about the "foreigners" coming into our country and "taking our jobs." Dear, most of your jobs are going to China and India. Didn't you watch that episode of 30 Days?

Addendum (12/7/2006): Because I can't keep track of every comment on social injustice, people. Here is Robert Jensen's article, "No Thanks to Thanksgiving" found at AlterNet. I'll still be celebrating the holiday every year, but my progressive smugness will be almost unbearable next Turkey Day. With passages like,

"Thanksgiving is the day when the dominant white culture (and, sadly, most of the rest of the non-white but non-indigenous population) celebrates the beginning of a genocide that was, in fact, blessed by the men we hold up as our heroic founding fathers."

how can I resist ranting at my mother and other assorted relatives about the slaughter of the native peoples of our country, as I ask them to pass the cranberry sauce? (In the can shape, of course. Yum!)

Monday, November 27, 2006

Pumping Boobs.

Okay, you can all calm down. The search is over. I found the post I was looking for on the underwear drawer earlier. The paragraph below had me in silent stitches:

From his bottlefeeds, Cal takes about 3-4 ounces every 2-3 hours while awake. However, he's supposed to be getting somewhere between 2 to 2.5 ounces per pound per day (or about 5 ounces per kilo per day) so it seems from my record keeping (we have this little binder of all his ins and outs so that we can round on the baby every day--only partially kidding) he's getting closer to 3 ounces per pound per day. Of course, some of this is only extrapolation since I'm still nursing him part of the time and my boob has no calibration on it (at least not that I can locate), but it has me thinking: are we feeding him too much? See, this is EXACTLY the type of question that, when I was a Peds resident, would have me ROLLING MY EYES at the CRAZY FIRST TIME PARENT because dude, your kid is FINE, he's not getting super-fat or puking up his feeds or looking distended and uncomfortable, so just CHILL already, Nervous Nellie, GOD. But now, see, here now is my punishment for being so "there there now, silly parent" about those concerns--now I know EXACTLY where those parents were coming from. Are we feeding our kid too much? How much is he really eating, anyway?

Crazy first time parent. Hee hee! Even though I'm not going to be a breastfeeding enthusiast when I have kids, I will certainly have some other aspect of childrearing that I too will be obsessed about. One of them will be gender neutrality, taken directly from X: A Fabulous Child's Story. Read it and learn, people. And remember, I'd like my baby's clothes in yellow, please.

My Monkey Baby.

New addition to The Sites I Like: the underwear drawer. It's a blog by a woman named Michelle, who works as a resident at some big hospital in New York City, and lives with her husband Joe and their 1-and-a-1/2-year-old son Cal.

In Michelle's Thanksgiving entry, she shares somes photos of Cal from Halloween this year. Yes, he is adorable. But he is dressed up as a monkey. I bring this up because I was watching the season finale of Def Comedy Jam this morning. One of the comics, Chris Spencer, of Significant Others fame, brought up how he had to stop his "Latin," (and I'm guessing) non-black wife from dressing up his black son as a monkey for Halloween. His joke wasn't that funny, but the concept amused me. He then asked her pointedly, what if they dressed up his son as a gardener, with a leaf blower to clean out people's yards? That part was funny, and got his meaning across, too.

Now, I personally could never dress up my (nonexistent) child as a monkey, or any type of simian creature, no matter how cute they looked. Hello, that would be so inappropriate! A little brown baby walking the streets of LA begging for candy in a monkey outfit? I don't think so. I would shame black people everywhere.

It's so unfair. What if my baby loved Curious George? Or Planet of the Apes? Or BJ and the Bear? That last one would be pretty sad, actually. I'd have bigger things to worry than a Halloween costume if my kid liked a live-action television show about a trucker and his chimpanzee.

Anyhoo, check out the underwear drawer. I can't find the post that truly inspired me, about how Michelle was doing her residency with 24-hour on call days, and stuck to her own anal-retentive breastfeeding/pumping schedule, out of fear of...well, I don't remember what she was afraid of. But reading about her self-inflicted insanity confirmed my ongoing proclamation that I will not be breastfeeding my biological kids after my maternity leave is over. After two months (or less), my monkey babies will be drinking formula, and they will like it.

Sunday, November 26, 2006

Addendum: Why I Hate Studio 60 (subtitled: Kristin is never coming back, Aaron!)

So yeah, I'm still going to watch the presumably last four episodes of this tres horrible show. But tonight I have found another explanation of why I hate Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. In the Television without Pity recap of last week's episode, "The Option Period," Miss Alli breaks down how Aaron Sorkin's misogyny and his inability to get over his ex-girlfriend Kristin Chenoweth are bleeding all over the show. The setup is, Harriet wants to pose in her underwear for some magazine, but Simon and Tom don't want her to do it, because right now she's "classy," and if she does the photo shoot, she will be "bargain bin...K-Mart." Yeah. Oh deary deary dear.

Miss Alli sums up the situation nicely:

Tom insists that "[the magazine is] getting the better end of the deal." [Harriet] wants to know why. "Because they're enhancing themselves, and you're diminishing yourself." Yes, by posing in your underwear, you are less. Literally, Tom just said that women who pose in their underwear are diminished. They are less. You can ogle their boobs, you can make comments about how much you want to see them naked...but if they give you what you are asking for and drooling over, then they become less than they were. It's pretty shocking, in that it's presented as logical rather than blisteringly misogynist, which it is.

And I love the slam on Aaron that immediately follows:

And if you want to get really creepy, just remember the subtext is that Aaron Sorkin is addressing his relatively recent ex -- who is frankly at least as talented as he is -- telling her that she is now diminished. She is now less. Sorry, Kristin Chenoweth. Forget Wicked. You're diminished, and your asshole boyfriend has decided to announce this not only to you, but to the general public as well. That guy's a class act all the way.

Preach the word, Miss Alli.

I knew there was something about The West Wing that always skeeved me out, even though I own Season 1-4, and adore so many of the episodes. That Sorkin way of being perplexed by strong, intelligent women often appears in his writing as simultaneous admiration of and disgust for those women owning their sexuality. I'm not saying that Harriet should or should not pose for Maxim (yeah, I said it). I am saying that it's none of Aaron's business what a woman chooses do with her own body. He definitely has no right to judge her about it, essentially lusting after her half naked body, then calling her a dirty whore if she dares show it to anyone else. And, he has no logical reason to make this non-situation the life-or-death plotline that Studio 60 hinges on for an entire episode. Who cares?! God, get over it, Aaron.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

How I Learned to Love Studio 60

After watching last night's god-awful episode, "The Option Period," I was tempted to never again watch Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. Even though most likely there will only be four more left to watch ever. Anyway, the writing sucked, the characters' motivations were terrible, and if Harriet wants to pose in her lingerie, she should just do it. Who cares what Matt, Simon and Tom think? Furthermore, don't Simon and Tom have anything else going on in their lives besides obsessing over their coworker doing a photo spread?

So. Today I happened upon this post on the MOM & Pop Culture blog, entitled "studio 60 -- the show i love to hate." I particularly enjoyed this excerpt: "Part of me hopes that Studio 60 goes on forever. Because right now I am so damn amused by its awfulness -- in the same way that I used to be amused by Baywatch. Believe it or not, Studio 60 has way BIGGER BOOBS than Baywatch."

Hee hee hee! With this new perspective, I am now reinvigorated to watch Aaron Sorkin's latest masterpiece. And by masterpiece, I mean trainwreck.

Saturday, November 18, 2006

I Heart Stephen Colbert: The Thomas Jefferson Edition

On Wednesday's episode of The Colbert Report, Stephen interviewed three Thomas Jeffersons to find America's Top Jefferson. I was concerned that he would only ask them about being the third President of the United States and appearing on the nickel. But then Stephen won me over, as he always does, by repeatedly asking the three Jeffersons about his legendary "affair," i.e. forced sexual relationship, with Sally Hemmings, who was not only one of Jefferson's slaves, but also his wife's half-sister. Nice.

The Jeffersons tried to dodge the subject, but Stephen kept nailing them, asking them if Thomas Jefferson wanted to be remembered as the "guy who banged his slaves." Check out these clips on the Comedy Central website, labeled Thomas Jefferson Pt. 1, and Thomas Jefferson Pt. 2. Stephen also presses them about Jefferson's penchant for weed.

Kudos to you, Stephen Colbert, for asking our "Founding Fathers," i.e. slave-owning hypocritical genocidal tax cheats, the tough questions.

Monday, November 13, 2006

"Happy Feet"? Well, I'm not happy about it.

I was reading the latest Leadership issue of The Hollywood Reporter when I happened upon this review of Happy Feet, the latest animated movie involving anthropomorphic, not-so-funny animals, thrust upon us by Disney and Pixar.

In the review, Kirk Honeycutt writes that Mumble, the adolescent penguin voiced by post-adolescent Elijah Wood (I love you, Elijah! I don't care if you're going to be the next celebrity to get "lanced."), "runs into a group of Latino penguins, the Adelie Amigos, who convince him that his dancing is actually cool."

What? A group of Latino penguins? Where do I begin?

Penguins come in species like Emperor, and King, and yes, Adelie. They don't come in Latino. They aren't descendants of Spanish conquistadors and the people they enslaved and/or slaughtered. They are penguins. They don't have the oppressor-imposed ethnic categories, like "Latino," that we humans have in America, Furthermore, Adelie penguins are from Antarctica. Unless I'm mistaken, there isn't a big influx of Latino culture from Chile and Argentina permeating that ice shelf.

As if that wasn't bad enough...who is voicing the leaders of these Adelie Amigos? Robin Williams.

Apparently I didn't get the memo that Robin Williams is now Latino. Last I heard, he still thought he was a sassy black man from the 70s. Or an African.

Tom is my friend.

I finally broke down and made myself a MySpace page, as you can see on the Sites I Like list. You can visit me at myspace.com/biancareagan. It's rather sparse, but it does have a song. So, come be my friend. I'm a fun girl!

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Democrats take control of the Senate.

And the House, too.

So what do I get out of this deal? I voted yesterday; I deserve something.

I'm hoping for universal health care, a raise in the minimum wage, and an end to the illegal occupation of Iraq, for starters. And a pony.

It certainly took you long enough, "news" media.

Check out The Miraculous Appearance Of An Agenda by georgia10 at Daily Kos. Those Daily Kos people are mad bloggers. How do they have the time?

What took so long?!

Here are two separate stories that occured in the past 36 hours, two stories that shockingly elicited the same response from me: What took so long?! (I love the interrobang. You should, too.)

Rumsfeld to resign

Britney files for divorce after 2-year marriage

It couldn't last forever. Thank goodness.

Midterm Midtacular: Election 2006

Democrats win House; Senate now tied. What I want to know is, who are the people who voted for Senator Macaca Goldstein (tm Jon Stewart)? Those Virginians should be ashamed of themselves.

Mr. Allen should be proud of his North African/Jewish/Californian heritage, not hide it under a white hood. Furthermore, he should get some professional help to deal with his history of hurling racial slurs at innocent Americans. That's not cool, Mr. Allen. That's not cool.