Friday, October 01, 2010

Welcome back, Grandpa.

The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Aaron Sorkin
Colbert Report Full Episodes2010 ElectionMarch to Keep Fear Alive

Stephen Colbert: So the movie's about Facebook. I saw it last week. Fantastic. It's got that super crisp Aaron Sorkin witty banter back and forth. Can I ask you something about the ladies in it?

Aaron Sorkin: Sure.

Colbert: Okay. You've got the opening scene which a lot of people have heard about. It's very crisp. It's Zuckerberg and his girlfriend? The one who broke his heart.

Sorkin: The girl who would start Facebook.

Colbert: Exactly. She is super smart, and she definitely gets the best of him.

Sorkin: Right.

Colbert: The other ladies in the movie don't have as much to say because they're high, or drunk, or blowing guys in the bathroom. Why are there no other women of any substance in the movie?

Sorkin: That's a fair question.

Colbert: Thank you.

Sorkin: There's one other woman, Rashida Jones, who plays a young lawyer.

Colbert: That's true, that's true. I apologize. She does not do anything in the bathroom.

Sorkin: No, she does not. She's a trustworthy character. She's a stand-in for the audience. The other women are prizes, uh, basically, that you, um, uh, that, uh, that--

Colbert: But are women at Harvard like that? That's what I want to know. I'm trying to figure out, you know, whether I really missed out on a college experience.

Sorkin: I wasn't accepted into Harvard, so I wouldn't know.

The interview continues:

Colbert: You have called Facebook "a performance, not a reality". What do you mean by that?

Sorkin: Yeah. What I mean is that when somebody goes on and says, "I had a girls' night tonight. We split five desserts. Better hit the gym tomorrow!" That's somebody who's trying to reinvent themselves--

Colbert: Are you reading my Facebook page?


Colbert: So you're saying that's not real?

Sorkin: No, no, that's someone who's trying to reinvent themselves as Ally McBeal. I want to make it clear--

Colbert: Are you upset because you didn't write that show?

Sorkin: You do not have to agree with me on this point to enjoy the movie.

[ . . . ]

Sorkin: I would love for everybody to think that I'm as quick and sharp and charming as Martin Sheen on The West Wing. And now everybody gets to do that. But I do think that socializing on the internet is to socializing as reality TV is to reality.

Ally McBeal? That show went off the air before Facebook was invented.

And speaking of reality, Facebook is as real as a certain Orangeman's hair dye and spray-on tan.

Aaron Sorkin. Still as technophobic, behind the times, and sexist as ever.



molecularshyness said...

"But are women at Harvard like that? That's what I want to know. I'm trying to figure out, you know, whether I really missed out on a college experience."

I'd say someone got nailed. Nicely done, Colbert.

I even avoid commercials for this movie because they just rub me the wrong way. That, and I already don't like Zuckerberg - I don't need to watch a movie about it. I use FB but am anti-Zuck. I'm only sad that JT put himself in the mix - I at least need another SNL appearance from him - if he's not gonna do another album anytime soon.

julia aka garconniere said...

great post! i agree with your commentary.

Bianca Reagan said...

Thank you, commenters! For the two months, those Social Network ads have been following me everywhere I go. I hope the torture has finally ended.