Monday, November 27, 2006

My Monkey Baby.


New addition to The Sites I Like: the underwear drawer. It's a blog by a woman named Michelle, who works as a resident at some big hospital in New York City, and lives with her husband Joe and their 1-and-a-1/2-year-old son Cal.

In Michelle's Thanksgiving entry, she shares somes photos of Cal from Halloween this year. Yes, he is adorable. But he is dressed up as a monkey. I bring this up because I was watching the season finale of Def Comedy Jam this morning. One of the comics, Chris Spencer, of Significant Others fame, brought up how he had to stop his "Latin," (and I'm guessing) non-black wife from dressing up his black son as a monkey for Halloween. His joke wasn't that funny, but the concept amused me. He then asked her pointedly, what if they dressed up his son as a gardener, with a leaf blower to clean out people's yards? That part was funny, and got his meaning across, too.

Now, I personally could never dress up my (nonexistent) child as a monkey, or any type of simian creature, no matter how cute they looked. Hello, that would be so inappropriate! A little brown baby walking the streets of LA begging for candy in a monkey outfit? I don't think so. I would shame black people everywhere.

It's so unfair. What if my baby loved Curious George? Or Planet of the Apes? Or BJ and the Bear? That last one would be pretty sad, actually. I'd have bigger things to worry than a Halloween costume if my kid liked a live-action television show about a trucker and his chimpanzee.

Anyhoo, check out the underwear drawer. I can't find the post that truly inspired me, about how Michelle was doing her residency with 24-hour on call days, and stuck to her own anal-retentive breastfeeding/pumping schedule, out of fear of...well, I don't remember what she was afraid of. But reading about her self-inflicted insanity confirmed my ongoing proclamation that I will not be breastfeeding my biological kids after my maternity leave is over. After two months (or less), my monkey babies will be drinking formula, and they will like it.

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