Friday, June 25, 2010

"Lunchus Interruptus"


Ten chapters completed in Bianca Reagan: Where The Action Is! An excerpt from Ch. 05:


“What is your role in The Good Senator’s office?” I asked Benjamin.

“Bianca.” He took a chomp of his Philly cheesesteak.

I waited for him to chew and swallow. “Benjamin?”

“I’m The Good Senator’s right hand man.”

“I thought you were Cassandra’s assistant.”

Mike snorted grains of garlic rice out of his nose. Cassandra tried to hide her amusement by looking away from Benjamin and fixating on her meal.

“I don’t like to limit myself with labels. I work with Cassandra, so it’s a team effort, per se. She rocks out the day-to-day stuff. Right, Cassandra?”

“Yup.”

“On the flipside of that coin, I’m more the action guy. Innovation. Synergy. Git ‘er done. That’s what I’m talking about.”

“Hmm,” I packaged the rest of my food in an eco-friendly take-out box for later.

“I’m a forward thinker. In other words, I move the team forward,” Benjamin gesticulated. “Inasmuch as I’m involved with The Good Senator during that point in time, and so forth.”

“Very important work,” Cassandra winked at me.

Benjamin ingested more of his greasy sandwich. “At the end of the day, we make laws.”

We? I didn’t consider myself a C-SPAN enthusiast, but during the few times I had watched what I liked to call The Men’s Wearhouse Security Camera network, I had never seen Benjamin deliberating on the Senate floor.

“I’m taking The Good Senator to a whole ‘nother level.”

“What level would that be?” I asked him. A squeak escaped from Mike, followed by a series of forced coughs from Cassandra to cover her guffaws. Benjamin was too busy building momentum to notice.

“We're going viral. We're taking it to the streets. He’s going to be a national figure on the main stage. I want every family in America talking about Senator Nate Summerfield, make him a household name.”

“Ambitious.”

“Coke. Nate Summerfield.” He drew Venn diagram circles in the air. “Nike. Nate Summerfield. McDonald’s. Nate Summerfield.”

“Just do it,” I said with a straight face. “I’m loving it.”

“We’re shooting to the top, Bianca. President Nate Summerfield.” His pointer finger stabbed the tabletop with each word. “That’s what I’m talking about. Like I always say—”

“So, Bianca,” Cassandra cut in. “Mike tells us that you work at Shake?”


.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Who does he think he is? Cher?



Harry who? Son omits Reid name from campaign ad, by Rachel Rose Hartman, Yahoo! News.

Rory 2010? Is one of the Gilmores running for governor?

.

I want to see his scatting and jazz hands.




Skip to 6:10 for the NSFW reference.

From Rob O'Reilly's "About Me":


I love puns, board games, pandas, netflix, sushi, Wilco, Lupe Fiasco, We Are Scientists, New Pornographers, 30 Rock, Arrested Development, Extras and the Office. I also like girls who like those things.


I like nine of those things! Also, he totally does look like "Harry Potter and John Lennon had a baby."

.

"You don't know me. You have no idea."

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I think I do, Ryan. I think I do. Leper, greasy cell phone, sarcasm in a heel click? Been there, done that.

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Tuesday, June 22, 2010

"It happens when you're not looking."


I don't know how many times I have heard the sayings below and wanted to tell the other person, in the words of Julia Sugarbaker, "You're full of crap."

19 Things You Should Never Say to a Single Person, by Erin Meanley, Glamour via MSN Relationships (sent to me by my similarly single friend from her married brother. Thank you, friend!). An excerpt:


1. It happens when you're not looking.
"This is just bull. Some people find people when they're looking; some don't. You're not doing anything wrong by going out and meeting people." —Beth

2. There are plenty of fish in the sea.
"I dated a guy whose last name was Fish. People just had a BLAST with that one." —Kelly

3. So, why are you single?
"I generally dislike this question. I mean honestly, if I knew why, I don't think I would be single right now, now would I?!" —Erica

4. You're too picky.
"This may be true, but it feels like I'm getting criticized for my taste, vision, and close-mindedness — when I'm already down." —Sarah

[ . . . ]

8. Just have fun with it!
"Um, don't tell me how to date in my thirties when you got married at 24." —Maya

9. Have you tried online dating?
"Duh!" —Elisa


And my favorite:


11. Well, when my boyfriend and I first got together…
"Wait, I still want to talk about me." —Elisa


Exactly. We were talking about me and my problems, not you and your . . . Oh, you've got to talk to someone else who's across the room? Great. Ciao.

I know that they are usually trying to be cheerful, or they don't know anything helpful to say otherwise. But mainly, I need someone to acknowledge that I'm in a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad situation. I don't need someone to tell me, "when the time is right, you will meet someone," unless they know when the exact time is and why it is not now.

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Monday, June 21, 2010

My favorite part of Please Give


He's so dreamy, though I could do without the scruffy soul patch. And he's representing for all the short guys:



So, Please Give takes a few jabs at your height, but what the film fails to mention is that Rebecca Hall might be an actual giantess.

[Laughs] That would just take away from all the comedic aspects of our relationship.


How tall is she?

I’m not sure. I know that I wasn’t necessarily short enough, or as short as Nicole Holofcener wanted the character to be. I’m, like, 5’7”, but Nicole said that when she found guys who were shorter, they had weird arms. [Laughs] So she didn’t choose them.


Had you ever felt like your height got in the way when you went up for roles?

I never felt that way, only because some of my favorite actors are my height or shorter. Dustin Hoffman is a perfect example of that. I think it takes a certain sense of confidence to allow my height to be made fun of without developing a Napoleon complex, and my character has that confidence and I think I have it a little bit.


I also enjoyed the cranky old lady, even though half of the cast was hoping her character would die:



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Sunday, June 20, 2010

"Money, money, money, money, money."




- from the mixed-up files of Janeane Garofalo

On a lighter note from "Garofalo", as she calls herself:





I keep the 20, too. (At 4:40.) It's right here, on my belly. I'm ready to work. Where indeed is my kudos from Siskel and Ebert?


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Thursday, June 17, 2010

The dumbness of the Atlantic

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Stephen Colbert Is Fighting Male Oppression and Men Are Over. Except At The Top., by Irin, Jezebel.


Is economic and social change fast disadvantaging men, creating a female-dominated society?

The question is posed on the cover of this year's Atlantic Ideas issue, pegged to a piece by Hanna Rosin arguing as much.



And direct from the article's mouth:


Earlier this year, women became the majority of the workforce for the first time in U.S. history. Most managers are now women too. And for every two men who get a college degree this year, three women will do the same. For years, women’s progress has been cast as a struggle for equality. But what if equality isn’t the end point? What if modern, postindustrial society is simply better suited to women? A report on the unprecedented role reversal now under way— and its vast cultural consequences



"What is equality isn't the end point"? And "unprecedented role reversal" with "vast cultural consequences"?

It's always nice when women like Hanna Rosin step on the backs of other women to make a name for themselves by creating irresponsible, propagandist media.

The premise of this front page article is completely ridiculous. Ms. Rosin should take a look at Samantha Bee's report on how difficult it is to be a man in America. (Spoiler alert! Not very difficult at all.)

This comment from Jezebel sums up my feelings. Warning: salty language ahead.


All of these end-of-men articles sound the same to me. "For the first time in human history, men don't have absolute dominance in all areas of public life. What are we doing wrong?!?!"

Give me a fuckin' break.



Also, from the first video at 3:15, I would love to acquire a baby girl from China, where "every checkout counter has Take a Daughter, Leave a Daughter tray." However, Stephen should review the requirements from the China Center of Adoption, which no longer allows single persons (or other freaks of nature) to adopt babies from China, despite the country's high supply of unwanted girl babies. Boo.


.

Who let all these brown people on Top Chef?



Five! Out of 17! That's . . . hold on one moment . . . (carry the 4; add the 2; yes, I graduated from elementary school) . . . 29 percent brown people!

You can learn more about Timothy, Tiffany, Tamesha, Kevin (the “Barack Obama of the cooking game”?), and Kenny on Bravo's Top Chef website. There's also Angelo, but he's too full of himself for my taste. And let us not forget Arnold, the token Asian person. Like his predecessors, will Arnold be short-tempered like Dale, manic like Hung, or angry and forgettable like Gene?

Take note, other television shows I watch. You can have lots of colorful people on the screen at the same time in significant roles, and still have a well-written, succesful program. Seven seasons of Top Chef? Crazy.

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Monday, June 14, 2010

"Oh, here comes the chubby funster."




For some reason, I've been into Ricky Gervais's comedic works over the past few days. My renewed interest started with Extras last week and has now expanded into reruns of The Office (UK). Jim and Pam are funnier in British.

Also, for you history fans out there, a bit about Rosa Parks:





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Saturday, June 12, 2010

"This should be on TLC!!"




If only they were big, or little, or fertile, or into baking cakes.

I discovered this pilot while watching a rerun of The Wendy Williams Show featuring Marlee Matlin. I would continue watching more episodes. Although I do share the reaction of one of the YouTube commenters:


Excuse me wtf is blackhood???


I have no idea. I'll bring it up at the next meeting.

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Tuesday, June 08, 2010

"Everything from China is tainted with communism"?

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The best part of this video is the girl wearing the pink panda shirt unironically. I like when she and her classmates laugh at Aasif's memories of parachute pants and ABBA.

The second best part of this video: Jay Chen, my official new blog crush. You've got some work to do, former #1 blog crush Jay Smooth.

.

It sounds like a older version of The Real World,



except less colorful, in every sense of the word (Is it really 2010?):

Rycroft pads resume, by Michael Schneider, Variety.

Melissa Rycroft has gone from contestant on "The Bachelor" to host of the dating competish's spinoff, "Bachelor Pad."

Rycroft will serve as host alongside "The Bachelor's" Chris Harrison.

[ . . . ]

"Bachelor Pad" premieres at 8 p.m. Aug. 9, once "The Bachelorette" completes its run. Show features past contestants and suitors from previous seasons of "The Bachelor" and "The Bachelorette" as they live in a mansion together and compete for $250,000 and another chance at finding love.



Also, I thought the title of the article was in an adjective-noun-verb arrangement, not a noun-verb-noun arrangement, but I was mistaken. Meaning, her pads aren't resuming; she is padding her résumé. Because it's the Bachelor "Pad". Puns. Homophones.

.

Monday, June 07, 2010

Marky Mark needs to work on his apology skills.




First, this happens:




Dude, this is probably going to be Tom Felton's only movie award ever. Unless you readers predict he'll be in a breakout role five years from now that provides more name recognition than "that blond guy from Harry Potter", I think he'll be retiring with his millions and appearing in character roles on the telly. Why did Mr. Wahlberg feel the need to hog all the screen time while our British friend was trying to thank his mother?

This is the "apology" that followed outside:





Seriously, Mark. Throw Tom a walk-on role on Entourage. Or at least tell him to say hi to his mother for you:




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Sunday, June 06, 2010

It's nice to see the over-40 crowd still moving and shaking.



And by "nice", I mean "scary." It has been a while, bless their hearts. Your body doesn't always work like you remember it did back in the day. This is not Mission: Impossible Tom Cruise. This is pushing-50 Tom Cruise. That man adopted a questionable accent and mannerisms, then jumped off a trampoline onto the stage. I was concerned that he or J.Lo would pull something with all that jumping and gyrating. Neither of them are Jack Palance at the 1992 Oscar Awards. He was a spry 73.

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Thursday, June 03, 2010

Tuesday, June 01, 2010

"Coitus Interruptus"



Eight chapters completed in the sequel to to Steve the Penguin! The tentative title of the second novel is now Bianca Reagan: Where The Action Is. An excerpt from Ch. 03:


SandyBeachGirl99: my nephew's birthday party wasn’t that bad. most of Mormon people were nice.


DannyOcean1112: we usually are


SandyBeachGirl99: it was more the not fitting in with my own family


SandyBeachGirl99: they moved to a new town without telling me


SandyBeachGirl99: not to mention the wedding they had 15 years ago without inviting me


DannyOcean1112: do you really want to play the Compare Families game?


SandyBeachGirl99: you win every time


DannyOcean1112: sister was in the pokey. brother with the gambling addiction. both still on probation, wondering what to do with their little ones at home


DannyOcean1112: now my sister is back on house arrest with the ankle bracelet.


DannyOcean1112: can you beat that?


SandyBeachGirl99: let me think. no.


SandyBeachGirl99: but I still wish I could be closer to my niece, considering she only lives an hour away


DannyOcean1112: you are making an effort. I know your niece appreciates it.


SandyBeachGirl99: I’m taking her and her friend to see a movie next month. the remake of Dance ‘til Dawn


DannyOcean1112: that TV movie from the 80s?


SandyBeachGirl99: yep, but this time it’s on the big screen, starring the usual suspects from every teen show on the primetime lineup. I think we’ll have a good time.


DannyOcean1112: well there you go. you’re the fun aunt


DannyOcean1112: i don’t get to be the fun uncle. i’m the responsible one. i am the one stable role model my nieces and nephews have.


SandyBeachGirl99: I know they appreciate you.


SandyBeachGirl99: hold on. phone call.


SandyBeachGirl99: talk amongst yourself


DannyOcean1112: give me a topic


SandyBeachGirl99: Rhode Island is neither a road, nor an island. Discuss.



.

Being someone's worst nightmare



I watched an excerpt of this video on Current TV today. It made me sad, seeing that there is such prevalent hatred of people like me, whose only crime is being born this way. This way meaning black, as opposed to one of my many other attributes that inspire prejudice and discrimination against me.

.

Monday, May 31, 2010

How could Chilli not choose Farmer D?



He's a farmer who wears cool hats and helps the homeless. What's not to love? To each her own, I guess. :|

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Sunday, May 30, 2010

"I don't know who Justin Bieber is."



"You know exactly who Justin Bieber is!"

Unfortunately, I do, too. You can't escape Bieber fever.

Also, who knew Aziz was such a fighter:



I wonder what story my baby pictures would tell.

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Monday, May 24, 2010

Have you seen Modern Family?




I finally started watching last week, after months of people telling me it was their favorite new show. I love when the camera cuts to Lily, the tiny baby, who never speaks, but always says so much.

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Wednesday, May 12, 2010

I agree, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar.

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Abdul-Jabbar says NBA entry age should be 21, by Eric Olson, AP Sports Writer via Yahoo! Sports.

Kareem Abdul-Jabbar says the NBA should raise its minimum age for entry into the league to 21.

The NBA’s career scoring leader and center on the Los Angeles Lakers’ 1980s “Showtime” teams said Wednesday there’s a disturbing sense of entitlement among many of today’s young pros.


“They get precocious kids from high school who think they’re rock stars— ‘Where’s my $30 million?’ ” said Abdul-Jabbar, who was in Omaha to speak at the B’nai B’rith sports banquet. “The attitudes have changed, and the game has suffered because of that, and it has certainly hurt the college game.”


[ . . . ]


Abdul-Jabbar met students Wednesday at Boys Town, the nationally acclaimed home for troubled youth. He told them about his time at UCLA, where he played on three national championship teams for John Wooden and graduated in four years with degrees in English and history.


“Coach John Wooden encouraged me to be more than just a jock,” Abdul-Jabbar said. “He said if I let my intellectual life suffer because I was so into being an athlete that I would be less than I could be. I would tell all students to pursue your dreams but don’t let your education suffer.”




Also, please enjoy the video above featuring Mr. Abdul-Jabbar and Stephen Colbert in HipHopKetball II: The ReJazzebration Remix '06.

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Monday, May 10, 2010

I saved a baby today!


For reals, I did!

A woman was standing on the corner of a sidewalk next to a busy street. She was holding onto a carriage. As I was walking towards the woman, I saw her turn around to look at something behind and let go of the carriage. The carriage rolled onto the asphalt and stopped a few feet away from the corner.

I rushed over and grabbed the handle of the carriage before it could roll any further. To my surprise, there was an actual baby inside! The baby looked calm, unaware that we were reenacting the opening scene of Ghostbusters 2.

I pulled the carriage back onto the sidewalk towards the woman. She was quite upset with herself and uttered some expletives before she thanked me. I said, "you're welcome," and went on about my business, proud to be a hero, a difference-maker in their lives.

I deserve a cookie.

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Sunday, May 09, 2010

"You don't even think about it. You just do!"



Well, I don't. Too much hype, not enough usefulness.

Maybe the iPad isn't appealing to me because I don't want to watch the latest Star Trek remake on my lap. Or because the people behind this "magical and revolutionary product" don't exactly reflect me.

"I don't have to change myself to fit the product. It fits me."

Of course it fits you, Jony Ive, Senior Vice President of Design at Apple. You made the product, along with a bunch of guys who look like you and live the same Apple-tastic lifestyle that you do. Setting aside the moneyed white male aspect of the design team, did anyone on the team consider making the iPad unbreakable or waterproof? That would fit me and my lady lifestyle.

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"Really?!?"




Yes, Saturday Night Live was actually funny this week, due in large part to Betty White. The other thing that helped? Guest appearances by former cast members from when the show had jokes.

I would have liked some "What up with That?", but I had to settle for some Scared Straight:





Also, what is Burn Notice?



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Thursday, May 06, 2010

"Cuatro!"

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"That's a bunch of Johnny Americans in there."

Arizona has some 'splainin to do. I wasn't going there anyway, but I'm certainly not going there now: Labor, civil rights groups press for national boycott of Arizona.

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Tuesday, May 04, 2010

A pancake cheesecake sandwich?




The new IHOP Stacker is almost as bad as the KFC Double Down. Call the paramedics before consuming:




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Monday, May 03, 2010

I would like to have a pair of anthropomorphic shoes



that greeted me at my door.

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Tuesday, April 27, 2010

"Because I'm wearing white pants."



I don't even know you. Though, you do seem very confident.

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Saturday, April 24, 2010

How to pick a career.



"I think what first drew me to acting was when I looked in the mirror, and I said, 'Wow, I am just like everybody else. I am like every other girl. Let me go into a business that is all about beauty and blending in, and my career will be amazing. How can I make the most money, the most stability, the least amount of rejection? Acting. Boom.'"

- Julie Goldman


It's funny when you see her delivery on the TV, but I can't find the video clip. Boo Logo.
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Tuesday, April 20, 2010

"I'm on a zebra."




Late, but still great. :)

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"Let's say The Rapture occured, and all the Republicans were gone."

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Yes, let us please say that, so us sane people could get something done.

"Would the Democrats at that point be able to pass legislation they want?"

I would hope so.

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Saturday, April 17, 2010

"Excellent work, counselor."




Such a sad movie. I remember seeing Philadelphia for the first time with my class in 1994. I cried then, too. Those lawyers were so mean to Tom Hanks. :(

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Monday, April 12, 2010

"A nanny, a baby, and a crippled black man."




For the past two days, I have been trying to figure out how to express my annoyance towards Tina Fey's appearance on Saturday Night Live this past weekend. For now, you readers can entertain yourselves with the following post: MONDAY ARTS SECTION: Time to Check In With Tina Fey’s Feminism!, by Sady, Feministe.

Instead of writing my own biting post, I have been distracted, chiefly by this article on the passing of Dixie Carter, who played feminist icon Julia Sugarbaker: Dixie Carter, R.I.P.: Her five best 'Designing Women' moments, by Tim Stack, EW.com.

I have been reading through the 300+ comments about her classic moments on the show. The quote above comes from the episode entitled "La Place Sans Souci." My favorite exchange that I was reminded of as I read the article comes from the episode, "Julia Gets Her Head Stuck in a Fence". I couldn't find a video clip for that particular, but here is another scene from the episode, and below is a transcript of the funny part:


Suzanne: I think these pantyhose are too dark for this dress.

Julia: Oh, my goodness. Suzanne, do something. That could be embarrassing. I mean, in 45 minutes when the finest people in Georgia are gathered here before me, I wouldn't want anyone to say, "Did you see that woman with her head stuck in the staircase? Yes. That woman the Governor just stepped over? Don't you think her pantyhose are a little dark for her dress?"

Suzanne: Now, listen, I have a lighter pair right here.

Julia: Suzanne, of all the experiences I would like to avoid, I believe having my pantyhose changed in the front hallway of the Governor's Mansion would rank right up there.


Speaking of Suzanne, here is one of my favorite exchanges of hers, from "The Rowdy Girls":


[The ladies are set to play the Supremes in a talent show, so in an effort to be more authentic, Suzanne buys everyone dark facial and body makeup.]

Mary Jo: Suzanne, we can't go around in black face, that's racist!

Suzanne: Why? If Dustin Hoffman was gonna play Martin Luther King, you don't think he'd wear black makeup?

Julia: Suzanne, Dustin Hoffman would never play Martin Luther King — that part would go to a black actor.

Suzanne: Well I think that's racist! I mean, I think it should go to whoever the best person is — and that could be Dustin Hoffman.


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Monday, April 05, 2010

Yes, I filled out my census form.


And yes, for question number 9, I selected the box labeled "Negro." Because some of us are still living in 1960.

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Sunday, April 04, 2010

Why am I going to watch this show?



Because I have no shame.

You can see an extended trailer here.

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Thursday, April 01, 2010

"You should change your name from C-SPAN to Black-SPAN."

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Where else is that caller going to go for the kind of coverage C-SPAN provides? The security camera room at the Men's Wearhouse?

I should start calling in to C-SPAN. I'll try to keep up that 80 percent.

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Writing is hard.


That is all.

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Sunday, March 28, 2010

I heart Parks and Recreation, too!



WEEKEND ARTS SECTION: Dear Leslie Knope of TV’s "Parks and Recreation,", by Sady, Feministe.

[ . . . ]


I don’t know what sealed the deal, but I strongly suspect it was the episode “Galentine’s Day,” where I figured out that you were probably the most likable lady character I had seen on TV in a long time. “Galentine’s Day” is, in addition to being the title of the episode, your name for how you celebrate Valentine’s Day, Leslie. It is an occasion on which you have breakfast with every lady you know and like — there are a lot of ladies you know and like, apparently! That is a full table — and you celebrate your mutual friendship and ladyhood with gifts, including “a personalized 5,000-word essay on why you are all so awesome,” written by you personally.


It is like the best! I mean, I can’t even count the number of times Parks and Recreation has shown ladies hanging out and relating — ladies talk about a lot of shit with each other on this show, things like politics and career and whether or not possums are hideous unearthly monsters that lay eggs — but this was just a really great moment, of a feminist lady on a TV show expressing, in a genuine and believable way, how much she likes and values and enjoys spending time with other ladies. And the greatest thing? That moment was not shown as inherently ridiculous, or stupid, or alienating, or wrong.


I mean, it’s a little ridiculous, of course. That’s why it’s funny. “Ladies celebratin’ ladies,” you say into the camera, with that big goofy wide-open smile on your face, like in such terrible earnest you are conveying the idea of lady-celebrating and it makes you so super-happy. It’s always funny to see people believe in things whole-heartedly without trying to be cool about it; it makes them vulnerable and goofy, like children. And, like, the name of the celebration is “Galentine’s Day,” which is the dorkiest. You are the dorkiest, Leslie: Sunny and awkward and naive and oh so very Midwestern. “It’s like Lilith Fair. Without all the angst,” is your follow-up line. Like Lilith Fair is the most XTreme Rock XPerience you could ever have. It’s so great.


You invited your Mom, Leslie. You. Invited. Your Mom. To the Galentine’s Day party. You do it every year! And it is just the sweetest thing. Ladies celebratin’ ladies. Why don’t more people do this? I think they should.


[ . . . ]


So do I! We should all celebrate ladies, especially other ladies. That's what Women's History Month is supposed to be about.

How are you readers celebrating women in a positive way?

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Monday, March 22, 2010

"Oh. That's what's supposed to happen."



Purity.

Running on the beach.

Twirling in slow motion.

That's an accurate representation of my period.

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Sunday, March 21, 2010

"I'm on a horse."



I want an oyster with two tickets to that thing I love.

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"Hey, what did you think of the movie Julie and Julia?"

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Does anyone still like Coldplay, much less wear a Coldplay t-shirt? Unironically, that is.

Also, I don't watch The Real Housewives of Atlanta, but I do watch Mad Men. Uh oh . . .


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I come from a "predominantly black family", too! But I have seen Sideways. Uh oh . . .

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Friday, March 12, 2010

"I know. She doesn't even work."



If you watched the rest of the episode, and the preview for next week, she needs to have a talk with her husband.

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Thursday, March 11, 2010

A baby paradox


Minority births on track to outnumber white births, by Hope Yen, AP via Yahoo! News.


Minorities make up nearly half the children born in the U.S., part of a historic trend in which minorities are expected to become the U.S. majority over the next 40 years.

In fact, demographers say this year could be the "tipping point" when the number of babies born to minorities outnumbers that of babies born to whites.

The numbers are growing because immigration to the U.S. has boosted the number of Hispanic women in their prime childbearing years. Minorities made up 48 percent of U.S. children born in 2008, the latest census estimates available, compared to 37 percent in 1990.

"Census projections suggest America may become a minority-majority country by the middle of the century. For America's children, the future is now," said Kenneth Johnson, a sociology professor at the University of New Hampshire who researched many of the racial trends in a paper being released Wednesday.

Johnson explained there are now more Hispanic women of prime childbearing age who tend to have more children than women of other races. More white women are waiting until they are older to have children, but it is not yet known whether that will have a noticeable effect on the current trend of increasing minority newborns.

[ . . . ]

Whites currently make up two-thirds of the total U.S. population, and recent census estimates suggest the number of minorities may not overtake the number of whites until 2050.


First of all, if there are going to be more nonwhite people in a country than white people, it is becoming increasingly illogical to call nonwhite people "minorities." I have never liked calling people minorities, because most "minority" people aren't a minority in the world. There are 1 and 1/2 continents full of Latino people, 1 continent full of black people, and a ginormous continent full of Asian people. Yet they are "minorities". Hmm.

Second, this phenomenon of minorities overtaking white people (?) is primarily attributed to "immigration" boosting "the number of Hispanic women in their prime childbearing years" "who tend to have more children than women of other races." Oh my.

a) Not all Hispanic people immigrated here. Some Hispanic people were actually born here. So were their ancestors.

b) Some Hispanic people are white. Who knew? I think these people knew. These people, too!

Third, another assumption in the article is that white women give birth to white babies, Hispanic women give birth to Hispanic babies, Asian women give birth to Asian babies and so on. But what about Native American and Middle Eastern babies in the US? What about Kendra's baby? What about Nicole Richie and her unfortunately named babies?

Fourth, I'm of childbearing age, yet where are the 2.13 children that I am supposedly having? How can I contribute to the upheaval of American society?

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Saturday, March 06, 2010

"This was the best season of The Bachelor ever."



"Best = most recent"

Either way, I don't watch the show. But the clips on The Dish and on The Soup = hilarity.

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"This year's Dottie English Whatever award"



"I still think awards are stupid. But they'd be less stupid if they went to the right people."

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