Saturday, November 17, 2007

But I like clams.

From day ten. by pamie at

...Andy Gordon is the person who taught me what a "clam" is. He taught me by pointing out that I'd written one in my first script that was to be produced for television. He pointed it out by shouting it to everyone in the room.

You see, a clam is not a good thing...

I hadn't meant to put a clam in my first Oprah joke during an Oprah-themed episode of television. That's a lot of Oprah jokes! And some of them got pretty clammy. I'd shorthanded a "What happens with Oprah stays with Oprah" joke that I meant to replace and somehow I forgot, and we're at the first table read in the writers' room, and Andy -- who is normally quite jovial and jokey with me, is all squirming and frowning and making these faces like I'm kicking him in the stomach. And we get to this joke and he shouts out as if he can't contain anything anymore, "Jesus Christ, can we do something about this CLAM on page thirty? It makes me want to KILL MYSELF."


Anyway, the other day, while rallying at the rally, a few of us started thinking of clams to write on our signs, to show our solidarity with other hack writers. Alex, Jessi, Rafael, Laura, and later Sara, all contributed to these gems.

"Could I BE any more on strike?"
"Note to self: Striking sucks."
"Hello.... strike."
"Strike is the new Job."
"What happens on strike, stays on strike."
"And by 'strike,' I mean asking-for-four-more-cents-on-DVD-residuals and by 'Picket' I mean wanting-a-cut-of-the-revenue-on-Internet-downloads-and-new-media." (our demands are a bit wordy.)
"So we're striking? ....Awkward."
"We're literally on strike."

Just a few I remember before we depressed ourselves.

But those clams were funny. In that context. Not as actual jokes on TV. I get the funny because of the irony of how trite the jokes are. My humor is an acquired taste, as are the rest of my qualities.


Stephanie said...
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Chrissy said...

I read pamie's blog and was laughing so hard at the clams! And I was also thinking I know what shows those are from (or used the most in).