Thursday, August 10, 2006

Turn that Frown upside down.



First they came after my shoes. Then they came for my baggage locks. Now they have come for my bottled water. The people running TSA are shaking down suspicious looking babies for their bottles of breastmilk, but these airline officials are still NOT checking almost "all of the cargo in the nation's aviation system" because "inspecting all cargo would slow down the system and cost billions of dollars." Hey Bush administration. How about you stop the illegal occupation of Iraq for ONE WEEK and use that extra $3 BILLION to hire a few people to look inside those big boxes criss-crossing our nation by plane every day? No? Still going to pat down and cavity search millions of innocent American passengers while you "elected" (ha!) officials fly hassle free on private jets? Okay. That's cool with me.

So what made my day okay? A little thing called schadenfreude. Today during lunch, one of my favorite coworkers and I were engaged in a heated debate over the efficacy of the above TSA policies. Before our tête-à-tête could turn to fisticuffs, the two of us were soon distracted by the television program playing in front of us, TLC's latest guilty pleasure, 10 Years Younger. The conversation then devolved into determining whether the haggard-looking woman being made over before our eyes got her much-younger-looking husband to marry her because she had a lot of money. I suggested that maybe the hot guy saw past her outward appearance, and loved her for the person inside. Whereas, my coworker suggested that they got married in Vegas the day before she had to be on television. True love, or famewhoring goldigger? Po-ta-to, po-tah-to.

My level of highbrow discussion did not increase in quality as time went on. In fact, my work day concluded with my introducing yet another of my coworkers to the infamously delicious site, Go Fug Yourself. Being a Fug virgin, she was quickly laughing out loud at the fashion don'ts of various celebrities. I tell you, having the power to make someone else guffaw at the sight of Tara Reid's cockeyed, mishapen "sandbags" really made my day.

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